therapy.

key to recovery: deciding whats important, deciding what matters. prioritizing. ive come to realize that maybe school and a career are not my first priorities. dont get me wrong, those things are very important to me; they've always been. i grew up that way. and its not like im saying i dont want a career, cuz im not saying that. but i realize im old enough to make my own decisions; and to realize what matters most to me in my life. ive also realized that perhaps, i am not high on my own priority list. maybe thats a problem, maybe its not. i dont really want to think about it. cuz that will lead me nowhere but back to where i am. like he told me the other day, theres no point in going back cuz you'll end up in the same place anyway. im starting to realize how true that is. but aaanyway. i just hope im not setting myself up for a lifetime failure.

honestly, im not sure what im trying to say in this post but as long as i get my feelings out then ill be okay.

i missed a lot this weekend. ohwell. this is what i get for putting myself in my current situation. damn, i miss being a nerd with my grades.